Over the years I’ve often been asked: “What’s the correct way to celebrate Memorial Day, and, is the word celebrate even the right word? Should we be somber and reflective, or happy and celebratory because of all we have to be thankful for?” To this I’d emphatically respond with: “Yes”- you should be both, wholeheartedly.
I’ve lost many friends and fellow veterans through the years. Some of them gave their lives in battlefields thousands of miles away, and others have lost their lives right here at home. A few years ago, I shared the immeasurable spirit of Tim Price who was killed in Baghdad in September of 2004 (Tim Price, My Inspiration on Memorial Day, and Every Other). On both the anniversary of his passing each September, and every Memorial Day I make sure I spend equal parts of time reflecting on his loss and sacrifice, while also celebrating his memory by sharing “Tim stories” with my three children. These stories remind us of how Tim lived his young life, inspiring us to be our better selves, while also reminding us to look beyond our day to day challenges in the context of those sacrifices endured by those fallen veterans and their families. And, I truly believe it’s the families that need all of us the most every day- especially on Memorial Day. I vividly recall one father’s journey who I had the honor of meeting over a decade ago.
I’d arrived at Dover Air Base very early that morning. While it was not my role as the casualty assistance officer to notify the family of their service-member’s death, it was my responsibility to help manage the days between notification and the funeral. I was assisting with the family of a 23-year-old young man who had been tragically killed in Iraq. The sense of grief and loss was palpable from the time I arrived until the time the family laid him to rest some three days later. The most poignant moment of those days came when his father insisted that he help prepare his son’s dress uniform for his funeral services. As we opened his son’s closet, where he’d left his uniform before he deployed, his father went through, piece by piece, sharing a story behind each article that was hanging in place.
“This is he letterman’s jacket”, he shared with pride breaking through some of his grief. “He was a two-time district champion in the shot put. His sister was the runner, but boy he could throw the shot a mile.”
The stories continued for well-over an hour, and in listening to his father I learned about this young sergeant, and learned even more about his father’s immeasurable pride in his son. It struck me how vivid his recollection of all those moments in time were- suites from middle school dances, to favorite shirts from first girlfriends, to varsity jackets and the exact distance of the winning throw. Every memory shared was a brief respite from the unimaginable grief, and the stark reality that his son was gone. There was even a laugh or two over a few “fashion mistakes”- as he labeled them- were revealed during our journey. And, it struck me that there was a hero in front of me- a father who forged through so much pain, to share memories of a life lived wonderfully.
Memorial Day is a day and a time to honor the sacrifice of those who we’ve lost. But, one father taught me that even through the darkest hours of loss there’s still room to share fond memories, and that these remembrances help us heal even the deepest of wounds. On this Memorial Day I’d like to pay special tribute to all the family members who’ve lost someone in the service of our country. Thanks to all of you for being heroes in your own right, and for sharing these powerful memories with all of us on Memorial Day- and every day of the year.
Andrew Morton is the Director of Veterans and Certification Affairs at SHRM.
In his role as the Director of Veterans and Certification Affairs at SHRM, Andrew Morton provides strategic leadership and direction for several of SHRM’s veteran, military-family, and disability hiring, retention and engagement programs. Andrew works with stakeholders across the military-service organizations to develop pathways for active-duty, veteran and military-family members to achieve relevant workforce credentials including SHRM’s Certification. Andrew also works with SHRM’s membership, and other partners to deliver resources that empower HR professionals, people managers, and business leaders in their inclusion-hiring, workforce-readiness, and employee-engagement efforts. This work includes SHRM’s initiative in support of second-chance employment through SHRM’s Getting Talent Back to Work initiative. He’s an award-winning speaker, delivering workshops and keynote sessions on the business case for and the business of integrating these highly-skilled talent pools into our workforce. In 2018, he was the contributing author to fellow-veteran Justin Constantine’s SHRM published book “From We Will to At Will- A Handbook for Veteran Hiring, Transitioning and Thriving in Today’s Workplace.”
Andrew also serves as spokesman for SHRM Certification in support of SHRM’s Chief Knowledge Officer, Dr. Alex Alonso. Prior to his current role within SHRM, Andrew spent five years serving as SHRM’s Director of Social Engagement, leading SHRM’s social media program and team.
Before joining SHRM in 2014, Andrew worked with a leading PR firm managing Fortune 500 brand and advocacy campaigns. Andrew is a retired Army Infantry-Officer who served in multiple leadership and command positions as well as overseas and combat tours including deployments to Iraq, Bosnia, Macedonia and Egypt. During his 21-year Army career Andrew also served in multiple senior public affairs positions including Chief of Media Outreach for Multi-National Force-Iraq, Chief of Marketing and Advertising for the Army Reserve, and the Director of Digital and Social Media for the Army Reserve.
Andrew is passionate about efforts to foster awareness and resources in support of mental health and our workplace- across all employees. Most importantly, Andrew serves as “Working-Dad” to his three wonderfully exhaustive kids at their home headquarters in Alexandria, VA.
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