Social Intelligence is often evidenced by the use of good manners. Many people presume they are socially (and otherwise) intelligent, but there’s always room for improvement, right?
So I’ve compiled a few (not exhaustive by any means) tips for checking my manners and my social intellect (in no particular order).
Just sharing:
1. Don’t do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Do unto others as THEY would have you do unto THEM, when it is reasonable.
2. Assume the person you’re talking to is as smart as you are, even if they don’t appear to be.
3. Resist asking questions that begin “Are you familiar with…?”
4. Smile!
5. Resist onions for breakfast.
6. Don’t stare.
7. Don’t smoke in public.
8. Wear a closed shirt.
9. Remember, most people are not obligated to you.
10. Cover your mouth when you cough and cover your nose AND mouth when you sneeze.
11. Don’t interrupt. Your conversation topic is not as important as the one you are interrupting…even if it is.
12. Never drop dirty dishes in the sink.
13. Don’t raise your voice except in cases of extreme emergency…or entertainment.
14. Respond in-kind. If they say, hello, don’t just grin. Say hello AND grin.
15. Let them miss you…and let them let you miss them!
16. Remind yourself that most of what you think should not be uttered and even when you think it should, think again.
17. Don’t try to be charming. The charming are gifted. Strained charm has a reverse effect.
18. Be quiet; loud is not charming.
19. Do a good job; charm is not technical proficiency.
20. Chew only with your mouth closed.
21. Back up! If they can smell your breath, you are way too close.
Rue Dooley, SHRM-SCP has been an HR Knowledge Advisor for SHRM for over 20 years and has plenty of HR experience as a practitioner and consultant. Rue has daily direct contact with HR professionals around the world, helping them to create solutions, to improve systems, and to find and use resources that improve the delivery of the HR function. Rue has authored and co-authored numerous articles on a variety of subjects; conducted webcasts and podcasts; created videos, and has been quoted in various media outlets.
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